Archive for the ‘RAMBLINGS’ Category

SAY

Wednesday, February 15th, 2012

What can I say????  I do not understand!  Hot, cold, lukewarm.  I guess I portray the same, even tho that is not my intention.  I am just trying to keep focused on what is and what is not, words and actions do not always agree, neither do mine.  I do understand this and can explain, if need be.  Glad I have what I do–Life is good!  Hoping it does not change unless……….

Do not read more into this than just the words, do not add or take away.

 

 

FURNACE

Saturday, February 11th, 2012

My furnace has not worked in 2 weeks.  I have been using a very economical space heater.  While it provides great warmth where I am, it does not warm all the areas I need heated.

I am not cold and really have not been.  A little chilled sometimes, but not cold and the chill is temporarily.

Do not know the problem, think it may be electrical, then someone said it could be a bad heating element causing the breaker to trip.  I guess I need to bite the bullet and call a repairman.

ANOTHER PLACE

Saturday, February 11th, 2012

I have found another fun place to go.  This one is in Evergreen and they have a once-a- month dance.  Music is provided by a DJ, everything from oldies to the modern stuff the teens like.  NO bar and this is good.

Last night the dancing was as varied as the folks there, some one would be dancing as couples, others would be line dancing, and some, like me, were wall thorns during the same song.

Car Pooling is an option and this helps with travel expense.

FANAGILE

Friday, February 10th, 2012

Is ‘fanagile’ a word?? oh well, ’tis now!!

I started some fanagiling Wednesday and completed it today.   I am so glad that things worked out in my favor.  In this case, 4 is always better than 10.

I must also say, I am very pleased and proud of myself, 793 is not bad at all, in fact it is very good.  I would love to see 815 or more and who knows, one day I may.

Another number I would like to see drop instead of rise.  Hopefully, in about 6 months 141 will be 130 or less.

To some this will not be a puzzle, to those that it is, you may be able to solve, if you know me very well and remember things I have said.

SUPER BOWL

Sunday, February 5th, 2012

I am still wondering why I even have on my TV.  I am not the least bit interested in  this football game and miss almost all of the commercials.  I guess this is what sometimes happens when one wants to be part of the crowd.

I want the crowd to be only 2, you (BBE) and me and we make the rules and play our own game and it is not football.  We would decide what is ‘in play and what is not’.  We may even set a world record!!

oh well, just another dream!

UNDERSTANDING

Wednesday, January 11th, 2012

Sometimes situations or actions are very easily understood and sometimes not.  Often all it takes for understanding is to be told why the sudden change in behavior or actions.  The mind will understand even if the heart does not agree.

It is very hard to understand why at the beginning of a conversation everything seems to be fine and then after maybe 90 minutes, one senses something is definitely wrong, asks and is told “I don’t know”.  Conversations ends after about 30 more minutes.

One is anxious about what happened and how and why he/she could feel such a change, but he/she does not initiate another conversation and attempts to do so by the first party are ignored.

Is this the way a real friendship is suppose to be—not to understand what was, is or will be or why?????

I do “Thank You” for helping me climb out of the valley and to the mountain top.  I know I can’t always stay on the top of the mountain ( am not there now), but know that because of you, your words of encouragement and compliments, and disbelief of some of my facts, I will NEVER be in the valley or anywhere near again.  THANK YOU!!!!!!

.

GOOD LIFE

Tuesday, December 27th, 2011

My life is so good at this point.  I am sometimes overwhelmed with the amount of happiness I am experiencing.  As is usual I was sitting here alone this morning, and felt so much peace within myself.  It felt as if my body had been washed over with joy.  I cannot explain how I felt but I know I am happy and satisfied with my life as it is right now and that God will always be for me.

I am not seeing anyone at this time and have not during my marriage or since my husband left me, and may never, but LIFE is GOOD.  I have been told that he was seen with someone.  I do NOT care if he has several girlfriends that he takes out.  I only hope that he can find as much happiness in his life as I have found in mine.  What we had, no matter how little or how much, is gone.  I am a better person for it because I will never again change my life and and not speak my mind because of what someone may think or do.  I will be true to myself and inner feelings.  In the future, a person will take me for who and what I am or not at all and that will be okay, too.  If I could change some things I would, but NOT the fact that he left.  I often think that maybe he should not have come back in 1981 or that when he wanted to have a fling with my best friend in 1996 that he had left then.

I have been told numerous times that I have a glow or sparkle about me.  I was recently asked if I had found someone or was I in love.  The answer is NO to the first question and to the second YES, I am finally in love and like the person I am today.  Just yesterday, someone told me I had a better attitude, no longer seemed gloomy, my eyes had a sparkle and my complexion was even better.

What will happen in my future, as everyone else, I do not know.  My plan is always be happy, always smile and whatever the situation, embrace it knowing LIFE is GOOD.

LIFE

Monday, December 5th, 2011

Life is GOOD!  I can’t change some of life situations that I wish I could, might be worse if I could.  I am the happiest I think I have ever been since I reached my late teen years.  My life is not a piece of cake so to speak, but I know it is the best for me.

I struggle sometimes financially but I know God never made a bird that he did not also make a worm for it.  My struggles will pass, make me a stronger person while they last.

I am lonely, only sometimes.  It is better to be lonely alone, than lonely with someone.  I am not nearly as lonely alone as I was with someone.  I no longer suffer because of emotional abuse.  I will never again be second in a relationship unless that is what I choose to be.

Will I ever be hurt in a relationship again?  I probably will, but that is my choice not a choice someone made for me.

I know that I am the one that now decides who, what, where, when and how.  So just take my word for it:  “I am as happy as I can be, if I could be any happier, I would be.”  Another quote that applies to me is:  “It is what it is and that is all that it is and nothing can change what it is.”

YES, LIFE IS GOOD!!

TIME PASSES

Monday, July 25th, 2011

Time seems to be just flying by.   I can’t seem to get half of what I want to do in a day done.   I have done quite a bit this summer, but can’t remember all of the importance.

One of the most important things was spend quite a bit of time with my daughter.  Cass Denise Darrow has studied and finished her college assignments in the morning and we have spent many afternoons together.

July 14th, we went to the concert at Leland Park.  That was a very enjoyable 2 hours.  Before the concert, we went to the library and I checked out a book and have not even read 100 pages.  Need to really get to reading.

We also went out of town and spent the week-end with her Dad’s sister.  Even tho, I divorced him, the family made me feel very welcome and loved and always have.

I have also put okra and beans in the freezer.  Hopefully, I can get some good fall peas for the freezer, also.

My cousin, Franny, and myself have spent more time together in the past 10 months than we had all our lives.

This is just a small token of what I am now doing—enjoying spending time with family and friends.

 

REPAIR

Friday, March 4th, 2011

I need 3 major repairs done to my car, can’t afford all of them at once so—-.  I need a serpentine belt, complete brake job, and front and rear struts.  I know the brakes need to be in good maintenance at all times, the belt is cracked and could break at any time and the struts have needed to be replaced for at least a year and a half if not longer.

It seems the struts have been replaced within the past 10 years, how long do they last, anyway?